by If This Is A Man

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released January 24, 2016



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If This Is A Man Stoke On Trent, UK

Jon White

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Track Name: Somehow
I was landlocked
I slept right through the winter
I picked up all the splinters but forgot
how the ocean casts a dozen fleeting photographs
across my every glance

thoughts draw back to you
on a train trapped in grey-blue, only you
I saw how you could save it
with a word you told my truth
and now the twilight aches of you

I didn't quite grasp
the moment not yet passed
I know such things are made of glass
I understand the transience of living on a chance

thoughts draw round to you
to the light of long-dead stars
the stammering of hearts
where your thoughts turn after dark
I made this lullaby to guide you through the fog
I hope you hear it somehow
I couldn't mean it without
Track Name: Floored
we were two ships that crossed in the night
kitten, when you are lost
I will leave the hall light on and sing you to sleep

as you sailed through dreams of Poseidon
I swam to escape the horizon
I won't ask your forgiveness but I'll hope that you'll see

when the siren calls the flood will leave you floored
let it hold you once more
as the sun slips under waves you'll feel the pull
at the front of your heart

now the hole too great to bridge
you saw the rust at the heart of the ship
well not here, not like this
this is not how you saw it

in the back of your mind
'was I wrong to welcome the sea in my lungs?'
well the rest of your life
seems a very long time to wait
Track Name: Slumber
all this tired sentiment lost on the page
all I'd wanted to tell you
all I'd wanted to say
swallowed in blankness
no word from my tongue
as we get older
we still sing the same songs
caustically human
but my father's son
if you kick the pedestal
I'll come undone

I came home to rest in your arms
God knows how I carried on here without you, my love

the off-white of winter
the feeling of home
could I drift into slumber?
could you knock me out cold?
days we devoured
the melting of our hands
through the frosts of September
the faintest of embers we two cradled naively
but traded a prayer for the truth
now you'll never know me
but I'll always love you

so come home and rest in my arms
God knows how I'll carry on here without you, my love
Track Name: Shame
come down
honey how you feel it now
the space between your house and your home
a clenched fist
trembling on the waiting list
with some flock you couldn't follow
and a lie you couldn't swallow, as your tongue

as it all spills out
the eyes all hit the ground and the tongues stay in their mouths
it's a shame
on all of us

you cant hide the look on your face
you can't sleep it off this time
you daydreamed
awoke into a Mike Leigh scene
if it hurts like love; that's enough

won't you put me down
cos the Lord don't hear me now and the kids won't come around
it's a stage every day

don't look
she's stumbling down the high street bare foot
painted into corners
I said you never warned us, it's not true
so long
darling where'd it all go wrong?
if it hurts like love; that's enough
Track Name: Calypso
now it takes hold
as I get home I'm alone now in these thoughts
with what I know
that you don't know

where will you go
when your sea legs call you home?
how should I know?
when I can barely feel myself now

don't tell me it's the same
it's written on your face some days
the words that you won't say

and how should I begin to make the bed
as the roof is falling in
Track Name: Untitled 2
in the small hours you go searching for your wolf
the broken glass beneath you
to remind you
you're alone now as before
neath the amber glow
so isolate
you'll go seeking answers
but the only thing you'll know
is that God don't know your name
but they do
the blood runs cold through you
closing in behind you
as your heart
jumps out through your throat
don't say we never warned you

now the dull ache
of the past you can't escape
will spill out on the street
as you scramble
to draw back from defeat
I wish I'd never seen it
as your thoughts turn against yourself
I wish you couldn't hear it
in your heart
a sense of longing for a world that you can't see now

there is another world beyond this
you've caught the briefest glimpses
in the seconds you've known God
in the years of your lost love
in the yearning sense that something bigger lies beyond
outside of these four walls
is a blank page
and a chance to kill this fate
if you could just see beyond this
for loneliness, the slowest death
will eat the bones from out your chest
there is a place for you, I know
so could you let go?
there is a way to find the will to carry on
there is a way to find the will to bring the fight to God
if you could just see beyond